Blog 751 - Saturday 12th April 2025

A Chat With A Big Bearded Man

I found myself in the Kenton Arms, sat next to a man of a similar age to me, who had a big, lumberjack-esque beard. Someone I was with complimented him on his beard then I ended up in a conversation with him. If I’m ever chatting to someone with a moustache that is so long it dangles over the lips, I’m always tempted to ask the same question. So I did. I said ‘Sorry if this question’s a little personal, but I always want to know, if you’re in a relationship, does your partner mind the long tache hanging over the lips? I always feel like it would be quite annoying.’
‘Well, my girlfriend’s just over there, the one with the red in her hair. I think she quite likes it but we can ask her.’ He called her over and we asked her.
‘I love it,’ she said. ‘Whenever I want to kiss him I brush it to each side...’
‘I have to keep it this length because then it couldn’t be brushed to the side.’
‘….and it’s become a little routine. Like when I brush it to the side, he knows I want to kiss him.’ Then she demonstrated, parting his moustache in the middle and giving him a big kiss. It was a sweet moment and I’m glad I asked. She went away and we carried on chatting.
‘You could grow one if you wanted,’ the bloke said.
‘Yeah, I’ve thought about it in the past but it gets too long and I just have to cut it off.’ I said
‘Sounds like someone has commitment issues.’
‘Don’t get me started.’